Cosmic Joke

dilemma [di-lem-uh]
- noun

A situation that requires a choice between options that are or seem equally unfavorable or mutually exclusive.

I'm pretty sure some higher being is laughing at the dilemma I face of having met someone I utterly connect with on all levels (which happens how often? Once or twice in your lifetime, if you are extremely lucky?) just weeks before I am to depart on the trip of a lifetime.

What would you do? Stay, and see where this amazing connection will take you? Or leave, to travel and indulge in experiences you've been wanting to try forever?

I mean, realistically I know I will be departing on my trip, barring any acts of God or terrorism that make it physically impossible or impracticable. I've never been the type of girl that will change my life or my dreams for a guy (I think the closest I ever came was contemplating moving to North Carolina for P, which I backed out of when I concluded that pretty much everything I want or care about is in the bay area and it takes more than just one person to complete your life). And yet. The idea of not seeing this person for months, and even worse, the possibility that time and distance will change this (in my experience, time and distance have a tendency to make the mind and heart forget things, people, feelings)...makes me maybe, possibly not want to go. Which is crazy, right?

Am I crazy if I stay? Or crazy if I go?