HK English

Officially, Hong Kong is a bilingual city. Maybe even trilingual (since it was returned to China, putonghua is required, but most locals speak Cantonese first, and maybe some English or putonghua). But English in HK isn't like English in the US.

First, there are the British influences on the language. You wait in the queue. You take the lift. You live in a flat.

Then there are the HK/Chinese influences to English. People always want to "double-confirm" a reservation. Instead of ma'am or miss, people call women "missy." "La" is often added to the end of a statement. "Ok, missy, you come pick laundry Saturday, ok la?"

Then there's the fact that actually, most locals don't really speak English. Which can make talking on the phone with service people really difficult. I can't recall how many times I've called the bank/cable company/airline/utility company or a restaurant and asked for an English-speaking person, only to have the person on the other end tell me in nearly incomprehensible garbled English: "I speak English, la."

When I first arrived in HK, I remember complaining to a friend who had lived in HK for awhile that I was having trouble communicating here. For example, I had tried to change a reservation at a restaurant from one night to another, but the reservationist on the other end of the line simply could not understand what I was trying to say. My friend asked me: "well, what did you say to her?"

I told her: "I called and told the person on the line that I needed to change my reservation because something came up and I wasn't able to make it today, and asked if that was possible."

My friend looked at me with a sympathetic but knowing look and told me: "You're doing it all wrong. You're using too many unnecessary words! You can't speak in full sentences, they won't understand you. Only use absolutely necessary words. 'Today. Reservation. No no no! Tomorrow. Reservation. Yes yes yes. Change!'"

And sure enough - that is exactly how you have to speak English in HK about 70% of the time to be understood. I'm trying my best to not let my English deteriorate to HK English, but inevitably, when you keep hearing something used all around you, it starts to sound normal. When I first moved here, the use of the phrase "double-confirm" used to drive me crazy. You don't double-confirm! You confirm or re-confirm. But now...I get it. They just want to double-confirm your change or your address or your reservation. They want to doubly make sure it's correct. I get it, la.